english version of >>[andreas]

No 12-14 Semua (balik urutan) |

andreas_en_@andreas_en_ : 2009-10-02 05:27:40 UTC+0000
diacu: >>14
by >>[yuku]
--
Extremely and Frustratingly difficult.
Only in recent weeks that I thought about this.
That I loved inadequately.

Sometimes I do good just to make satisfy others or myself.
Because I thought, "hey, I am helpful to others"

Why so? The differences are very clear in these 2 cases:

case 1: I helped Mr. xyz bought a screwdriver because in my opinion he would need it to repair something broken. And true enough, he was happy when I gave him the screwdriver and paid me back for the screwdriver.

case 2: I helped Mr. xyz bought a screwdriver because in my opinion he would need it to repair something broken. But when I gave him the screwdriver, turns out that he already owns a screwdriver, but anyhow he is willing to pay me back for the screwdriver I initially bought for him.

(After typing out the examples, I don't think they are that good, but anyway)

On the first case, I am much more happy unlike the second case. But shouldn't that be the case if my doing is purely based on love?

Probably the reason why I can be so close with some friends is none other than because it's requiting.
andreas_en_@andreas_en_ : 2009-10-02 05:38:48 UTC+0000
>>12
Guess it's corrupted human nature? The requiting factor will always be there. I feel the same way when helping out people financially, specifically friends. If he needs something urgently and actually has the courage to swallow his pride and ask to borrow money from me. Assuming I have surplus of money at that time and decided to lend him some of my money. The thought of whether he will be able to repay is always there no matter how small, even though I'd be alright even if he's not able to return the money in the future.

In my opinion, even if we say "I am really willing", there will always be a feeling of self-boasting that goes along with the so-called willingness. Even if we really really wanted to help.

The topic is getting astray the more I write... Guess I gonna rest my case :D

 

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